Texas 0, OU 12
For a coach making $3.5 million this year, more than anything, what did Mack Brown need most to assuage angry Texas fans and appease the unforgiving media after getting shutout on national television and beaten for a 5th straight time by arch nemesis Bob Stoops? An armed escort out of the Cotton Bowl...maybe. A new offensive coordinator...undoubtedly. A fresh pair of underwear...forget it. I'll just tell you, Mack needed a little PR, Public
Relations. You know, crisis managment. (Hey, if it can work for Bush Vs. Kerry, it can work for Brown Vs. Stoops.) And since I see life through a beer glass that's always half-full and I've been known to do a little spin control with my own tenuous football career, I thought it only appropriate that I provide the media with another view of Mack Brown in what I like to call...
1) Mack Brown is the only coach in the country with eight straight seasons with nine wins or more. (Let's see Bob Stoops do that without winning one single Conference Championship.)
2) Not counting the losses to OU, Mack has lost less conference games than
Bob Stoops since the 2001 season. (Not so tough when you're not knocking the crap out of Bevo are you Bob?)
3) Since 2001,
4) Mack Brown has never lost to
5) Mack Brown has won three recruiting national championships. (Let's see Stoops do that without winning a national championship or developing a Heisman Trophy QB or doing any actual coaching whatsoever.)
6) Mack Brown has never lost the week after getting beaten severely by OU. (Care to go double or nothin' Bob?)
8) In the last four years following the Oklahoma game, Texas has lost only one regular season game, while OU has lost at least one every year. (Got a problem finishing Bob? Hey, a lot of people have trouble with premature...celebration.)
9) Mack Brown has just as many South Division Big XII Championship trophies as Bob Stoops. (So put that in your butt and poke it Bob.)
And the most important reason Mack Brown outclasses Bob Stoops...
10) No coach in the history of college football has ever looked as similarly to Sheriff Rosco P. Coltrane as Mack Brown. (Sorry Bob, I guess you'll have to settle for Deputy Enis.)
Now don't you all think it's time we quit harping on Mack Brown and admit that he's...
"PRETTY PAINFULLY GOOD"
Skip Bayless, a veteran sports writer of many years, described Mack Brown in his column last week as being "pretty painfully good." In the five years I've been writing this commentary, I don't think I've ever pegged Mack quite as well. How else can you describe a coach who recruits better than just about anyone out there, has a winning percentage just shy of .800, keeps the stadium packed every game and has yet to really win one truly significant game - no National Championships, no Conference Championships, perennial trips to 2nd-tier bowls and an absolutely abysmal record against Top 10 teams.
Even the harshest critic can not argue that Mack Brown hasn't brought
Mack finally went out and hired new defensive coordinators last year and things got better. I don't know why he can't do it on the offensive side. It's no coincidence that Bob Stoops has had three coordinators win head coaching jobs at other programs in his tenure at
Regardless of whether Mack ever figures this thing out, the fact is, nobody is more devastated with losing to OU and wants to win worse than Mack Brown. As much pain as we fans feel right now, nobody hurts worse than the coach. And I can promise you this. But at the end of the day and at the end of another tough game all the apologies and excuses and acceptance of blame don't matter if there's no repercussions for failure. They're just meaningless words to appease the media and the masses until the next monumental loss. But instead of showing Deloss our displeasure we entrench Mack's position ever more so by coming early, being loud, staying late and buying anything orange we can get our hands on. And why do we do this, because Mack, ever the consummate politician is always prepared with another stat or anecdote just like the one you've already heard many times this week: After he loses to OU, Mack always wins...
THE NEXT GAME
This is the first time
(Forgive me, but you knew I had to go here...)
Was it over when the German's bombed
Tell that fat lady to take five. I know you're hurting. Maybe you feel alone, perhaps abandoned or unloved. But you got to hold on for one more day, things will go your way, and if they don't, there's always the YMCA. Hey, when the going gets tough, the tough go out and find some little nerd and whip his ass just for the hell of it.
Winning isn't every thing, it's the only thing that helps the medicine go down. So swallow your wounded pride and your gum if your chewing some and go out there and give me 110%, at least half of the time. It's go time. It's show time. It's "Eeny, meeny, miny, moe, catch a Tiger by his toe and whip his ass time. It's eye black all over your face, big disgrace, kickin' Mizzou's ass all over the place time. So show me how to paint the fence Daniel-son, and when the breaks are hitting the boys, tell Mack to tell them to go out there and win one for the stripper. Holy sh*t, pass me the Pepto.
Kickoff against the Missouri Tigers (Sigfried and
QUOTE OF THE WEEK
Only decent comeback by a Longhorn last Saturday..."Why would I want to live in a place (