Texas 35, Rice 13

Forgive this very, very abbreviated commentary, but little 54c arrived a week early and Coach Brown is at our house right now getting an oral commitment from the little guy for 2022 recruiting class...(of course the only oral commitment 54c cares about right now involves a very sore boob and I'm not talking about Greg Davis). On to...

THE RICE GAME

Pretty much all you need to know is before the game, Rice had the #1 ranked defense in the nation against the run...after the first quarter, Cedric Benson dropped them to #87 all by himself. 35-13 is not exactly a spread beater, but who cares, Texas isn't going to get any style points for giving Rice a wedgie on a regional telecast. Plus, I think Mack let the Pom-pom Squad play defense for us in the 4th quarter...

THE NEXT GAME

Even though my son was born at Baylor hospital, I'm thinking the Bears have about as much chance of scoring against the Horns this weekend as I do of getting more than 30 minutes of sleep tonight.

UNPREDICTABLE PREDICTION

I'm taking Goliath to cover against David (+36).

TAILGATE UPDATE W/Jason Whittemore (Color by 54b)

In a move (Do it, Do it!) designed to get the boys (the Mack Pack) ready for the early start time in Dallas (um, I thought we were focusing on Baylor), the athletic department (Deloss) has set the kickoff for the Baylor game (grin and "bear" it) for 11:30am. That means breakfast tacos (Egg-celent choice) and Bloody Mary's (part of this nutritious breakfast) starting at 8:00am! (Don't be tardy) For those of you diehards (Yippee-ki-yea) we will still have beer ("hooray, Beer!"), but (if you act now) the bar will also include OJ for screwdrivers (Vodka and White Bronco sold separately), and possibly some champagne for Mimosas (Hello Frisco). Make sure you (hey, guy in the orange) get down to the tailgate early ("we must protect this house of pancakes") and get started on the right foot (care to dance?)! As my Dad always said (Rehab is for quitters?), "You can't drink all day if you don't start in the morning!" (Good talk Russ)

QUOTE OF THE WEEK

As the camera pans a raucous Memorial crowd and focuses in on a young lady who's frowning even though Texas just scored against Rice...

"I think she just realized she could have had a Hot Chick Scholarship to Rice, but at Texas, she's just a walk-on."